The Fauster & Fauster Program

This is an e-bay post, I am selling all of the cryopatient's souls I had leftover from my years in the MILE Foundation. The Fauster & Fauster Program was a program the Meme Team started at the MILE Foundation. It is a way of paying for the upkeep of the cryopatients by selling their souls as works of art. We were able to do this using a mathematical paradox called the Banach-Tarski Paradox. It states that using a series of rigid motions it is possible to dissect a ball into equidecomposible sections and reassemble them together into two balls of the same size and mass of the original. So, the souls could be sold as works of art to collectors ad infinitum.

The Snowflake Program

The MILE Foundation has an internal program called the Snowflake Program. The idea for the program was designed by Nathan Shafer, based in the movie Demolition Man. The basic program is simple, as cryopatients are suspended information is downloaded into thier vitrified brains, seeing as how vitrified brains aren't frozen, and the cells are just dramatically slowed down until they are virtually immobile. The exact information that is downloaded is dependent on what the cryopatients want. But the cost is staggering and no one is sure what any after effects of this program may be.

Cold Brains Cool Memory: Flavors from the Cryopunk Gelatoree

Cold Brains Cool Memories
(DIY Cryonics Style Liquid Nitrogen Gelato)

Flavors:

Vanilla Sky
A classic vanilla bean ice cream, inspired by the movie but like out of
a dream!

Chocolate Hazelnut
A real Italian style chocolate hazelnut gelato, malto freezo!

New York Egg Cream
Custard flavor ice cream with a bit of seltzer, a bit of good chocolate syrup and you eat it with a spoon!

Pistachio Cream Cheese
Cream cheese and pistachio ice creams with pistachio meats, the
perfect combo of nutmeats and cheese, a must!

Steampunk Root Beer Fountain Cult Classic
A soda jerk/steampunk classic root beer ice cream with vanilla
marshmallow swirl, tossed into an infinity of pleasure, served in either sundae or float form!

Irineo’s Green Tea Mango
Irineo’s famous green tea and mango flavored ice cream with real flecks of mango, serving in a cup or in a cone!

Zombie Outbreak Oatmeal Mania
The zombie powered vanilla ice cream with bits of anarchist oatmeal delight cookies, suspended in the very middle!

‘Pataphysical Protoplasm Praline
Using the powers of protoplasm, we take a vanilla bean ice cream and suspend living water bears inside, imitating the living parts of the cell, served with whipped cream and a cherry!

Cyberpunk Spumoni
Fruit and nut ice cream with cherries and cashews, the hybrid ice
cream from the future with all the flavors of the Sprawl!

Agutuk (Alaskan Ice Cream)
Shortening ice cream with blackberries, served with smoked salmon,
if you haven’t tried it your life isn’t worth living!

New York Apple Pie and Cheddar Cheese
Vanilla ice cream with apple pie crumbles, served with shredded
cheddar cheese, a New York classic!

Jim Bob’s Jalapeño Strawberry
Jim Bob has done it again with the fiery burn and soothing pleasure of strawberry ice cream infused with jalapeños!

Cryopunk Sundae
Almond ice cream with suspended pieces of marzipan, butterscotch swirl, served with hot fudge and sprinkles, it’s waiting for you!

Kaladi Red Goat (Alaskan Coffee Ice Cream)
Inspired by the artist’s life and loves in Anchorage! Alaska’s best
roaster, Kaladi makes the best coffee ice cream you have ever
even thought of, kicks frozen ass!

The Big Space Fuck (Spaghetti Ice)
Our immortal specialty, inspired by the artist’s youth in Europe and
named after the short story about cryonics by Kurt Vonnegut, Jr., it is
all of our awesome flavors pushed through a ricer, creating spaghetti ice cream, served with whipped cream and a cherry!

2487: What Memories Real?

Meme-Riders Nathan Shafer and Shawn Cheatham recently did a show for the Smithsonian Museum of the Cryopunk, entitled "2487: What Memories Real?" This show initiated the Brainfreeze, which is a cryonic neurosuspension device/ ice cream maker, there were three movies made for the show, and liquid nitrogen ice cream was made by a team of DIY soda jerks.

The End of an Oeuvre: Why I am here...Buck Rogers and Me

(For Michael Moore in the 25th Century)


Lyrics to Suspension Theme
vocals by Kipp Lennon



"Far beyond the world I've known,
Far beyond my time
What am I, who am I, what will I be?
Where am I going, and what will I see?
Searching my mind for some truth to reveal
What parts are fantasy, what memories real?
Long before this life of mine,
Long before this time
What was there, who cared to make it begin?
Is it forever, or will it all end?
Searching my past for things that I've seen
Is it my life, or something I've dreamed?
Far beyond this world I've known,
Far beyond my time
What kind of world am I going to find?
Will it be real, or just all in my mind?
What am I, who am I, what will I be?
Where am I going, and what will I see?"